But there are so many Runners out there, more every day it seems, and new or old it seems you sometimes need some advice. I know what a lot of you are thinking, "It's Proxiehunter" you're saying to yourselves "He's going to advise us to stab it with a knife." Others of you may actually remember advice I've given in your comments sections that didn't involve killing something, and in at least one case advice to not kill in that specific situation. Besides knives aren't for everyone they require a lot of skill to use well and a strong stomach. The results tend to be messy.
"So," you ask, "what is he going to talk about here besides how to kill a Proxy?" Well, for one thing I'm going to teach you how to identify Proxies. Not just the masked bastards of tall dark and faceless who got me started on my crusade, but the servants of other eldrich beings like the Puppets of the Wooden Girl James Carlson is dealing with, or the Camper of EAT, the Convocations nests, or the disturbing new implications of the Cold Boy gathering Proxies of his own. I'll help you figure out which can be fought if you're the type to do so and which you should run away from nearly as fast as you'd run from their master. I'll give information on how to tell when Slenderman or another Fear is up to something in your area and what to do if you think you or someone you know is being stalked by one of Them. I'll give tips on how to survive and tips on how to avoid getting arrested.
I've got a lot more rules than three so this is going to take some time. For now I'm just going to answer one question I'm sure some of you have been wondering about. Why did I misspell my user name? Well, doing what I do I run the risk of concussion. I happened to be suffering one when I made the first account under this name and I didn't notice the misspelling until I'd been using it so long it would be difficult to change. So now I'm stuck with Proxie instead of the proper Proxy. Sometime tomorrow I'll get on and post my "things every Runner should have". But now, that twitchy guy I've had my eye on is leaving the library. Time for me to follow him and make sure he's not about to put on a mask and snatch someone for the tall bastard.
Jesus just get to the stabbing already.
ReplyDeleteNot this time. It was a false alarm of a sort. He did snatch a kid but it was apparently for . . . personal use. Instead of slicing him up I just beat the hell out of him and left him laying there for the cops.
ReplyDeleteI will be watching you with great interest, Hunter.
ReplyDeleteInteresting. You seek to kill us, but we only seek to enlighten you.
ReplyDeleteCuckoo, the "enlightenment" of what you serve is the last thing the human race needs.
ReplyDeleteMaurice. I've heard of you. Is it you or Rachel I'm speaking with? She seems a good person, where Maurice deserves nothing but my knife no matter who's body he has a time share with.
However Maurice has implied that if she forgets him he will be gone forever. For once there may be a solution to a Proxy that *doesn't* involve my knife. Normally I would advise minimizing any contact with a Fear, but there *is* a way Rachel could forget. Irrevocably forget. The question is whether or not the cure would be worse than the disease. And since it could just as easily lead to Maurice forgetting Rachel I'll say no more at the moment.
And I'm going to have to apologize to Rachel for that last comment of mine. You see, I was only up to July in her blog where the Maurice personality was still taking over from time to time and acting suspiciously like he still served tall dark and faceless.
ReplyDeleteIt seems you have that under control these days. Hell, it looks like you're currently on a path similar to mine although for different reasons. Still if there are any remnants of that personality don't trust it to always have your best interests at heart Rachel.
Its not the real Maurice. The real Maurice didn't always have your best interests at heart either. And it's the one that did the suited bastards dirty work.
You know you could change your display name really easily, right?
ReplyDeleteI mean, I understand why you wouldn't know that, considering it has nothing to do with stabbing people, but still.
So, you finally got yourself a blog to help us Runners in dealing with proxies. Thank goodness for that. I really need the advice.
ReplyDeleteI could change my display name, yes. But Runners, even ones who aren't me, are a paranoid bunch. Even if I accepted that someone who posted as *Penni* Balisong was in fact you and not someone posing as you with deceit in mind name changes by bloggers are often a very signifigant thing. For example when Joey Steward became *Joseph* Steward. More than in most places a bloggers name says who they are. Changing it is not to be done lightly.
ReplyDeleteThank god you finally made this damn thing. I was getting irritated with having no blog to match you with. Now I finally do!
ReplyDeletePrepare for the comments. Your inbox will be screaming soon.
Wait, wait, wait. You mean to tell me there are others like the Slenderman? How many are there? Why do they even exist? AND HOW CAN I GET HIM TO STOP STALKING ME?! If you're here fo help us, I guess I'll read on, but considering your last post was seberal months ago, I'm sincerely hoping you're alive. Sincerely.
ReplyDeleteI seriously need help, though. He just stands there, watching. I'm not sure how much longer I have.
Ah, America. The land of hope and glory. I'll stick to glowering across the Bering Strait, thank you very much.
ReplyDelete