Thursday, January 26, 2012

Birds of a feather

Before I get into this post a little update on my current situation. I haven't seen that Puppet since she vanished into the Empty City, although I doubt I'm lucky enough that it ate her. I did however locate that pyro Proxy again. He was hauling a can of gas to his next target, I followed him down an alley again and this time with no one to interrupt me stuck my knife into his right kidney and gave it a twist before pulling it out. Amazing how that tends to bring people to their knees in pain. A quick slash across the throat and he even stopped screaming. As an added bonus he'd brought along the means of disposing of his own body. I wiped the blood from my hands and knife onto his cloths and lit him up before heading on my way. One less Proxy out there screwing with the rest of you.

Now onto the subject of this post. Birdbrains. Feather Heads. Or as most of you probably know them, Nests. Servants of the Convocation they let those fucked up birds (or as they like to call the "The Bright Ones") live inside their own bodies. No one's quite sure how they manage this as many hold more birds than would be physical possible even if all their organs had been removed. Most let the birds out by cutting themselves open (which as I've previously mentioned is what makes them dangerous to fight, they tend to bleed gouts of pissed off birds instead of blood when wounded) although at least one seems to be able to let them out at will. This is probably due to the fact that his eye sockets are empty so they can just fly out when he removes his mask. He's also the only one I've heard of who demonstrated powers beyond releasing the birds from his body, he relies on them to replace his eye sight and it's been implied that he can see through their eyes even when they aren't inside him. The most famous of their kind would probably be the Witch of Gatlinburg (who the Blind Man Cultists at the Archive were kind enough to detail). For all we know the same woman has been the Witch of Gatlinburg since the early 1800's, which may imply that Nests don't age after they become infested with birds. Another prominent Nest in the blogging community is The Midwich Cuckoo, who apparently is part of a whole fucking flock of the bastards. He details some of their, forgive the pun, pecking order here.

How does one identify one of these Nests? Well, a lot of them are obsessed with birds. They tend to have a lot of scars from releasing the birds (if they've been a nest for long you might mistake them for a cutter due to all the scars). Most carry a knife, although some (who don't plan to fight hand to hand) prefer a razor blade since it's more concealable. I've even heard of cases where Nests simply grew their nails long enough to open up a gash in their skin for the birds to come out. Most of them also seem to have trouble acting human anymore. The most telling sign though (other than seeing them release the birds) is that they will often feed the birds with in them by eating things that the birds inside them would enjoy, swallowing them whole. Apart from the fact that they swallow whole rather than chewing it's not quite so telling when one is popping sunflower or pumpkin seeds. On the other hand once you've seen one swallow worms, or live fucking mice (I think that one was hosting owls) you can be pretty damn sure you're looking at a nest.

Killing them on the other hand is extremely difficult, what with the built in defense mechanism of swarming birds. Crocodile Tears has had some luck with bird (or buck) shot and fire, but you know my reasons for discouraging guns and packing Molotov cocktails or flame throwers are a bit conspicuous. An aerosol can and a lighter might handle the fungal form of the Choir, but probably isn't enough to bake four and twenty blackbirds into a pie. Some ideas I've had, but not tested, are strangling the nest to kill them without breaking the skin. However you do have to occupy their hands so they don't cut themselves. Poison might work, the question is if it would kill the birds within as well as the host. Harder to arrange would be a powerful electric shock, but it might do the trick (for the Nest at least, the birds have been known to produce lightning and may be immune).  Also you run the risk of an electrical burn that might split the skin. I stress that these methods are untested and should only be attempted in an emergency.

So I'm pretty sure that sums up current knowledge on the Nests. For all you Birdbrains out there I leave you with this fine musical number:


Everyone else, Stay Alert, Stay Alive.

9 comments:

  1. "(who the Blind Man Cultists at the Archive were kind enough to detail)"

    ...Why does everyone keep calling us a cult?

    --SΣ

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Because you are.

      Then again, so am I.

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    2. We do not worship the Grandfather. We merely pay respect to him. It's like Buddhists and Buddha, or Catholics and Saints.

      --SΣ

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    3. so you're all fools? that seems to be the common denominator here.

      Delete
  2. Wait... Not all Nests can see through the birds eyes? Holy shit! I'm Special!

    Love the song btw. The birds didn't like it much but I thought it was amusing.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. If they can you're the only one I've heard talk about it.

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    2. In that case I choose to believe the birds like me more than the other nests.

      Delete
  3. proxiehunter, also known as the rogue pawn, i, whitelight, hereby dub thee...//Bad Motherfucker//.

    yeah. i'm talking about proxiehunter.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. There's another title I can live with. another post is coming soon guys. I've just had to stay on the move for a while and haven't had time to compose on of my usual posts.

      Delete