Thursday, January 26, 2012

Birds of a feather

Before I get into this post a little update on my current situation. I haven't seen that Puppet since she vanished into the Empty City, although I doubt I'm lucky enough that it ate her. I did however locate that pyro Proxy again. He was hauling a can of gas to his next target, I followed him down an alley again and this time with no one to interrupt me stuck my knife into his right kidney and gave it a twist before pulling it out. Amazing how that tends to bring people to their knees in pain. A quick slash across the throat and he even stopped screaming. As an added bonus he'd brought along the means of disposing of his own body. I wiped the blood from my hands and knife onto his cloths and lit him up before heading on my way. One less Proxy out there screwing with the rest of you.

Now onto the subject of this post. Birdbrains. Feather Heads. Or as most of you probably know them, Nests. Servants of the Convocation they let those fucked up birds (or as they like to call the "The Bright Ones") live inside their own bodies. No one's quite sure how they manage this as many hold more birds than would be physical possible even if all their organs had been removed. Most let the birds out by cutting themselves open (which as I've previously mentioned is what makes them dangerous to fight, they tend to bleed gouts of pissed off birds instead of blood when wounded) although at least one seems to be able to let them out at will. This is probably due to the fact that his eye sockets are empty so they can just fly out when he removes his mask. He's also the only one I've heard of who demonstrated powers beyond releasing the birds from his body, he relies on them to replace his eye sight and it's been implied that he can see through their eyes even when they aren't inside him. The most famous of their kind would probably be the Witch of Gatlinburg (who the Blind Man Cultists at the Archive were kind enough to detail). For all we know the same woman has been the Witch of Gatlinburg since the early 1800's, which may imply that Nests don't age after they become infested with birds. Another prominent Nest in the blogging community is The Midwich Cuckoo, who apparently is part of a whole fucking flock of the bastards. He details some of their, forgive the pun, pecking order here.

How does one identify one of these Nests? Well, a lot of them are obsessed with birds. They tend to have a lot of scars from releasing the birds (if they've been a nest for long you might mistake them for a cutter due to all the scars). Most carry a knife, although some (who don't plan to fight hand to hand) prefer a razor blade since it's more concealable. I've even heard of cases where Nests simply grew their nails long enough to open up a gash in their skin for the birds to come out. Most of them also seem to have trouble acting human anymore. The most telling sign though (other than seeing them release the birds) is that they will often feed the birds with in them by eating things that the birds inside them would enjoy, swallowing them whole. Apart from the fact that they swallow whole rather than chewing it's not quite so telling when one is popping sunflower or pumpkin seeds. On the other hand once you've seen one swallow worms, or live fucking mice (I think that one was hosting owls) you can be pretty damn sure you're looking at a nest.

Killing them on the other hand is extremely difficult, what with the built in defense mechanism of swarming birds. Crocodile Tears has had some luck with bird (or buck) shot and fire, but you know my reasons for discouraging guns and packing Molotov cocktails or flame throwers are a bit conspicuous. An aerosol can and a lighter might handle the fungal form of the Choir, but probably isn't enough to bake four and twenty blackbirds into a pie. Some ideas I've had, but not tested, are strangling the nest to kill them without breaking the skin. However you do have to occupy their hands so they don't cut themselves. Poison might work, the question is if it would kill the birds within as well as the host. Harder to arrange would be a powerful electric shock, but it might do the trick (for the Nest at least, the birds have been known to produce lightning and may be immune).  Also you run the risk of an electrical burn that might split the skin. I stress that these methods are untested and should only be attempted in an emergency.

So I'm pretty sure that sums up current knowledge on the Nests. For all you Birdbrains out there I leave you with this fine musical number:


Everyone else, Stay Alert, Stay Alive.

Tuesday, January 17, 2012

A title I can live with

So, after all that playing at cat and mouse I finally got my confrontation with the woman who had been following me. Bitch wound up ruining a perfectly good kill too.

I was stalking a Slenderproxy I'd traced back to three Runner deaths by arson in the last month and I'd finally managed to catch him in an alley away from witnesses. Had my knife out, carefully approaching from behind planning to slit his throat and she just turns up behind me and clears her throat. Of course that gets his attention and he turns and sees me with my knife out. Seeing as he's a torcher not a fighter he uses whatever fucking mumbo jumbo it is their faceless bastard of a boss gives them and Paths the hell out of there.

I turn on her, furious, and she speaks up meek and quiet as mouse - staring at her damn feet the whole time. "Mr. [Proxiehunter]*, Sir. This one did not come to fight you. This one is only delivering a message. This one's Mistress will be unhappy if the message is not accepted." Yeah, like I needed more conformation of what it was she served, I'm only aware of two Things that can be properly identified as female in this line of work and this lady didn't seem like someone who'd been through an encounter with Little Nameless. I told her to talk quick or I just might carve a piece of her to make up for missing that damn Slenderproxy and it happened . . .

She jerked ramrod straight like she'd been pulled by a string and her eyes went blank. The next words out of her mouth sounded hollow, like they were coming through a bad mic and her jaw flapped like a ventriloquists dummy instead of her forming her words like a normal person.

"[Proxiehunter], Slayer of the Chosen, Pawn who has gone Rogue. You upset the balance of the Game. Your interference has allowed pieces to remain on the board that should have been taken long ago, and removed those that should still be in play. This is your only warning. Cease to interfere with Our Game or you will be dealt with." After that the Wooden Bitch's control left her and she nearly collapsed. I reached out to grab her, to try and get more information out of her, but she turned and suddenly a Door appeared behind her. I backed off quick when I saw that, the last thing I need is a one way trip to the Empty City. Hell, I'd rather go to Detroit. She opened the Door and went through and it vanished behind her as she shut it.

Slayer of the Chosen, I can live with that but I'm no one's fucking Pawn. Did the Wooden Bitch really think this was going to scare me off? Besides that damn Proxy is still out there lighting up Runner's housing while they sleep.

*She used my real name here, I have no clue how she or her boss managed to find that. And for those who have seen the name I used to sign up for some of the online services I use to communicate, did you really think John Smith was my real name?

Friday, January 13, 2012

Get down with the sickness

I'm really starting to hate this bitch. When she's following me she's harder to shake than pneumonia, I try to force a confrontation and she turns down a blind alley and vanishes. I really hope her Mistress hasn't developed something like the Path of Black Leaves. But on to the topic of this post. I was originally going to talk about Nests but then the Faceless Bastard showed up. I'm going to take some time and see if he accidentally drops some new information on his kind before posting on Nests (Rule 7 folks, the Enemy's blogs are a source of information. Use them.).

Instead I'm going to discuss the Proxies of someone long thought to lack Proxies, the Plague Doctor. I know that a lot of you are discounting the thought right now, but think about this . . .

In this world we have bug chasers , anti-vax doctors, doctors who prescribe antibiotics like they're M&Ms - which paradoxically creates stronger antibiotic resistant bacteria . . . the list goes on and on. People who positively encourage the spread and strengthening of disease. If that's not working for the glory of the Plague Doctor than what is? Trace these ideas back to their source and I have no doubt you would eventually find someone with the Stick and the Serpent displayed in their office decor, or perhaps their jewelry. Last week a Runner of my acquaintance contracted a very nasty infection when a back alley "doctor" sewed up a knife wound (don't look at me! A Slenderproxy knifed him!) without disinfecting his equipment properly. Well, I visited that "doctor" to have a talk about proper sanitary procedures and during the discussion his shirt tore revealing the Stick and the Serpent tattooed on his arm. Lets just say after that the conversation turned ugly. Good thing the building next door wasn't nearly as flammable. These folks are subtle. Unless you see old beaky's sign on them it can be nearly impossible to tell them from someone with a few crackpot ideas (which they probably got from an actual servant of his). But for all their subtlety they can do a lot of damage. Like a recent pox party (a brilliant plan to spread disease far and wide if I've ever heard one!) where the kids came home with an especially vicious strain of measles instead of the chickenpox their parents were hoping to expose them to. That strain spread all over the state and caused a lot of deaths before burning out.

As if these Plague Bearers weren't bad enough recently I've been hearing of Mad Doctors. For example, this Doctor Beakman (wonder if that's his given name or if he changed it in honor of his patron) who seems to enjoy using his knowledge of the human mind to break it rather than heal. Mr. Carlson is not the first to encounter that particular man and it seems madness, possibly handcrafted by the man himself, follows him wherever he goes. The first I heard of him involved a former patient of his who had been seeing him for anxiety - several months after showing improvement the bodies of children who had gone missing in her neighborhood were discovered buried in her basement. The news reports said that she had been prescribed an "Extract of Salmacis", but that when the medication in question was analyzed it appeared to be nothing more than water. Those of you who read my last entry know what that means. He clearly had her on a dose high enough to cause obsessions without tripping her all the way over into Camper but I don't know how he managed to plant the obsessions he wanted. While I wouldn't say the Mad Doctors are as subtle as a Plague Bearer they can get away with a lot of experimentation and patient abuse before coming to the attention of the AMA (or whatever group governs the medical profession in their country of origin) and who knows what sort of experiment one might decide to preform. Again, your only hope is to spot the Stick and the Serpent before they do something nasty to you in the guise of actual medical treatment.


Remember, this:





Is the symbol of a doctor.

This:



Is the symbol of the Plague Doctor. You shouldn't find the second on or near someone who's going to make you better.

Why do they do it? As far as I can tell it's some sort of cult. There seem to be a lot of rich and powerful people at the top of this and that street doc had to be able to pull in a lot favors to keep operating without getting busted. Not to mention that pharmacopeia I found before his building caught fire due to circumstances that had nothing to do with me. The painkillers and antibiotics could have been useful, but given their source I couldn't guarantee they weren't contaminated in some way so I got them out of there, dissolved them in water and poured the water into some cat litter before throwing it out (the proper procedure for disposing of medicine so it doesn't get into our water supply). All that aside, they're not a huge unbeatable supernatural menace. They're just people, although people who chose to side with the embodiment of disease instead of their species, and if you have to defend yourself against one (unlikely. They don't like to make crude frontal attacks.) they bleed and die like anyone else.

These bastards are hard to see coming, so until next time Stay Alert, Stay Alive.

Wednesday, January 11, 2012

Lets go camping

The Camper, for all we know about it/them there's a lot we're unsure of. For example should the Camper be referred to in the plural or the singular? For all that the individual bodies can act like independent beings there's good evidence that the Camper is one being with multiple bodies. Hell, the Camper may even be EAT rather than serving it.

More than most Proxies one can not discuss the Camper without discussing the being behind it/them, EAT. The first verified encounter with this entity was by an associate of the late Jordan Dooling, a girl named Sam. It was she who named it the The Epping AquaTarkus after a song, shortly before she herself became a Camper/part of the Camper. Other names it's gone by are Ichor, the Loom, Salmacis, or Scylla. What EAT does is dwell in bodies of water slowly replacing the water with excretions of its own, most commonly known as Ink or Ichor, that are indistinguishable from the water they replace. What this Ichor does when consumed by a living being is quite insidious. Just a small amount makes you want to return to the source of the Ichor and submerge yourself in it. This is the last thing any sane individual wants to do as the Ichor will replace all of your bodily fluids with itself effectively killing you and leaving only a/the Camper in your place. Probably the only reason we haven't all drowned ourselves in Ichor by this point is our bodies defense mechanism against it (this mechanism does imply that EAT has been with us a long time, or else we wouldn't have evolved such a defense). Simply put, ingestion of the Ichor causes an obsession with something unrelated to the body of "water" in question. If this is enough to keep you away from ingesting more Ichor it will eventually pass from your system. I don't know that it's been experimented with, but at least theoretically a diuretic could speed this process if one finds themselves infected with Ichor. Most are prescription but goldenrod and juniper berries are probably available from health food stores or the herbal supplement aisle of your local S-mart (shop smart!). Caffeine is another easily available one and I'm sure most runners enjoy the ocasional coffee, cola, energy drink, or entire bottle of no-doze so they don't have to sleep and risk nightmares or actual attacks by Proxies or Fears.

If however one gives in and drowns themselves in the Ichor than the process of becoming Camper has begun. In some cases the poor soul will return home, in others they remain next to the "water" (some have been found still floating IN the "water", an especially nasty trick since their "rescuer" risks infection), but in all cases the victim appears to be in a coma. They remain in this state, often thought of as Stage One, indefinitely until someone tries to interact with them*. Once someone of the same species interacts with them they move on to Stage Two where they will copy anything said, word for word down to the tone and inflection. They may also mimic actions at this point but that isn't always the case. Soon they move on to Stage Three and begin analyzing those attempts to communicate with it. During this stage they will repeat individual words from sentences they've heard, sometimes attempting to arrange the various words they've heard in new ways (for example if the only words they've heard by this point are "Would you like an apple or a pear with your lunch?" all you would hear at this stage are either repetitions of one word - for example "apple . . . apple . . . apple" or attempts to rearrange it into new content like "Lunch apple pear like you would your a or an for". It's not clear if what happens next is properly thought of as one stage or multiple ones but in Stage Four they show a rapid gain in intellect progressing from correct simple sentences to more complex sentences, now its using words that it may not have heard from you. It might even use words that the person they used to be never knew (although I've never heard of a case where one spoke a language that it hadn't heard in Stage One). At this point they have a lot of knowledge, but no tact (less than me even) and will probably be acting nothing like the person they used to be. This is followed by what one hopes is the last Stage of development, depending on who's list you go by this is either Stage Five or Stage Nine. They appear to go back to normal. I stress here that this is a facade only, the person you may once have known is gone all that's left is the Camper pretending to be them so that it can operate as EAT's scouts, spys, and hands. They've been known to spike water supplies with Ichor and carry those resisting the call back to a pool of Ichor to drown them and make more Camper. Once they've reached what is hopefully the final stage they are extremely difficult to spot unless you know they went through the previous stages. They may occasionally show knowledge that they shouldn't have (EAT is a being of knowledge, as far as I  can tell anything it knows the Camper know) and from what I've read and the few I've encountered (okay, there's a slim chance they weren't Camper, but honestly if you try to slip something into the water supply I don't think people are going to cry much when you wind up with a few stab wounds in you. A city employee would have been in uniform, in a city vehicle, and probably wouldn't have been putting any legal additives in the water supply at 3 in the morning.) they are often damp. I don't know if it's because they like to be in contact with water/Ichor as much as possible or if they just sweat a lot but it's kind of gross.

If you need to killing Camper is as easy as killing a person (unless, I don't know, you're dealing with a converted elephant or something. Anything that drinks/lives in water can become Camper.). However remember that their bodily fluids have been replaced with Ichor, you do not want to come into contact with it. While I've never heard of someone becoming infected by contact with Camper's blood no one wants to be the first.


There are a few disturbing rumors going around pertaining to Camper and to EAT that you should be aware of. Firstly, the rumor that there is a stage of Camper beyond what I've mentioned here. No one who's claimed this has been able to say what this stage is however so I'm not that worried. Besides, if I stab them at Stage Five/Nine they'll never get to the hypothetical Stage Six/Ten.


More disturbing are rumors that a high profile national brand of bottled water has been taken over entirely by Camper. No one can agree on which one though. There are also rumors of gangs (especially the Timber Wolves) mixing Ichor into the drugs they sell to create an obsession with the drug in question and increase sales. I've also heard of it being sold as a homeopathic remedy, usually as "Extract of Salmacis". There are even rumors of groups who have weaponized it.


Damn it. My tail just walked in the door again. I'm going to have to confront her soon and get this - whatever the hell it is - over with.


Until my next post, Stay Alert, Stay Alive.


*Although there have been cases where a period of time ranging from days to weeks has elapsed while under a doctors care before they moved on to Stage Two. Perhaps there are different strengths of Ichor out there?

Thursday, January 5, 2012

The rules and you

Now, I'm sure that we all know about M and his three rules.

1: Get up high
2: Keep moving.
3: Keep your eyes open.

Today I'm going to talk about which of those will keep you alive and which ones will get your ass killed. Then I'm going to add a few rules of mine.

Lets take a close look at that first rule. At the time M thought that if you got at least three stories up the tall faceless bastard wouldn't be able to find you because he can't conceive of a person being taller than him. Even before the other Fears were discovered there was one huge problem with this rule: As much as we wish it were true the skinny dude isn't a fucking moron. In any case where this rule appeared to work it was probably just a case of tall dark and faceless not wanting to collect the victim in question yet. The discovery of other beings of equal power and malevolence adds another problem to this rule. Do you know what tends to be found "up high"? Fucking birds and where you have birds you have the possibility of running into the Convocation. If you don't think a flock of birds with a hive mind who want to kill your ass are something to be afraid of I suggest you watch more Hitchcock.

Rule 2, Keep Moving, is something I can agree with. I don't recommend abandoning your home and your life unless absolutely necessary but  even if you don't become a full fledged Runner don't hole up in your house (or a fortified hole in the ground!) and refuse to leave. It makes you easy to find and I've heard of no defense that will definitely keep Them out. Besides, holing up like that risks alienating yourself from society which invites a visit from the Cold Boy. If you start hearing a child singing nursery rhymes look out for his frozen visage because little boy blue is probably on his way to turn your ass into a Popsicle.  So keep moving, but keep connected (another reason I recommend that pre-paid cell phone). As part of Keep Moving I recommend against posting to your blog from home (unless an idiot near you has unprotected wifi). Try to post from the library or a wifi hotspot out in the community so tech savvy Proxies can't track you back home. Also try to avoid posting from the same location twice in a row or having a discernible pattern of where you do post from (it's Tuesday, so if I want to kill him I should go to the library he'll be updating his blog from!).

Rule 3 is Keep Your Eyes Open. As much as I don't like arguing with this rule, while the rule itself is sound M's reasoning was shit. I have been physically present while someone was ripped limb from limb because she apparently mistook Slenderman for a fucking Weeping Angel from Doctor Who and thought that if she was looking at him he wouldn't be able to do anything. Despite what M said that is NOT what Keep Your Eyes Open is about. As a matter of fact I would amend this to "Stay Alert, Stay Alive". You need to be constantly aware of your surroundings, not because They can't act if you're aware of them but because if you see Them or Their minions coming for you then you can be prepared. You'll have a chance to run or fight before you have a knife sticking out of you or a tentacle stuck in naughty places instead of after. This also means that, as much as you might want it for stress relief alcohol and recreation pharmaceuticals have to go. You can not afford to get fucked up if you want to survive.

So that's what I think of M's rules. Now time for a few of my own. This is not an exhaustive list, if I went into all of them in detail I'd probably fill up a book the size of the seventh Harry Potter hardcover.

My first rule of course is my amending of M's rule 3 "Stay Alert, Stay Alive", followed by "Keep Moving" as the second. Third, Don't Involve Outsiders. It's been shown that people who are not aware of Slenderman or other Fears are less likely to attract their attention than those who already know. Usually when someone who isn't aware finds themselves Stalked it's because they're investigating the disappearance or odd behavior of a friend or loved one who is. Either that or they find some Runner's notebook and learn about Them that way. My point is your sister, brother, parents, friends . . . if they aren't already being targeted with you don't make them into a target by telling them what's going on. They probably won't believe you anyway. However, you can't afford to become alienated which brings us to . . .

Rule 4: Build relationships in the blogging/Runner community. Your friends in the blogosphere and Runner community can offer survival tips, moral support, and sometimes back up and discussing your situation with them doesn't make them more of a target than they already are.

Rule 5: Don't Wear The Symbol! What the fuck made you guys think wearing the Operator sign was a good idea? Yes, it makes it easier to identify each other. It also makes it easier for a Proxy to identify you! Then there's the fact that there are rumors the symbol draws Him rather than repelling Him, why take that risk? Finally wearing the Operator sign makes people want to figure out what that symbol you're wearing means violating Proxiehunter's rule 3. And of course I've seen this starting to spread to Runners running from other things as well. The hoodie with a stylized birds foot on the back was especially amusing. Damn that looked dorky.

Rule 6: Don't Go In The Woods. We all know that's His territory so why the fuck do I see video of so many people who know they're being Stalked by Him wandering blithely into the forest, some of them having assured me that they've been researching Him? 90% of the time they don't have anything approaching a decent excuse. Even if the woods didn't belong to Him, you know what you find in the woods? Birds again. We've already mentioned that where there are birds you can meet the Convocation. But there are also bugs, and bugs mean the Intrusion may be near. While there may be a chance you can get the Convocation to eat that manifestation of the Intrusion instead of you I wouldn't count on it. The Rake has also been spotted in rural areas, although he has also shown an odd preference for closets - especially those of children. The last danger of the woods lays in the bodies of water than can be found in them. The water in a still forest pond might not be what you think. I'm just glad there's no evidence that EAT has gotten into the Great Lakes yet and is still only found in rural areas here, it means I haven't encountered Camper very often.

I think that's enough rules for now, I've picked up that damn tail again. Next time I get a chance I'll talk about either Nests or the Camper I haven't decided which.

Sunday, January 1, 2012

Detecting and fighting the Slenderproxy

I seem to have shaken the woman tailing me for now. I swear if she were blind and less submissive looking I'd think Penny had abandoned Jeanette and started stalking me. But on to the more important subject of Proxies.

The first Proxies seen, and still the most common type encountered, are Proxies of Slenderman. Fortunately except for rare cases they are one of the least dangerous types having few to no supernatural abilities. Their main use seems to be to harass, spy on, and hinder tall dark and faceless's victims when He's busy ripping someone else apart with his tentacles. One thing we can be grateful for is that He apparently can't be everywhere at once.

They can be divided into several distinct groups. First, there are the hollowed (or as the more functional of the group prefer hallowed). These have had a large portion of their will and personality removed from them either because they would serve no other way or because they failed him and were punished (I've seen a few who thought of it as a reward, but I've only seen them say that after it had been done). At the lowest level of functionality this group is catatonic when not activated by a superior Proxy or their Master. If they aren't wearing the mask Slenderproxies often affect they may be mistaken by some for an early stage Camper*. The difference is that while Camper will repeat words spoken in it's presence and in some later stages imitate actions an inactive hollowed will either ignore your presence or attack. The lower function ones tend to be tacklers. Even when active they're often mute.

Higher functioning hollowed may have their own blogs or comment on the blog of a Runner or Fighter. They tend to be rambling and incoherent bordering on schizophrenic. They also tend to communicate in code. In person they're often twitchy, mutter to themselves, and can be in general mistaken for crazy homeless people. They do tend to pay too much attention to obvious Runners (is the ability to easily identify each other really worth the problems wearing the Operator sign openly brings?) and they may attack on sight if not constrained by someone more functional. Some are crazy enough to wear their mask at all times, these are obviously easy to spot, others are more cunning and only wear there mask when "working". They favor knives and clubs but aren't adverse to tackling you and beating you to death with their bare hands like their lower functioning brothers. The hollowed sometimes seem to be immune to fear or pain. So if you weren't smart enough to do so already steer clear of twitchy looking homeless people who talk to themselves. No matter how little hollowing has been done there is some degree of intelligence lost so this type doesn't do a lot of strategic thinking and is often used as foot soldiers.

Even higher on the functionality scale are the people who serve willingly. These people range from serial killers to thugs with an occasional cultist thrown in. Usually mad they do tend to hide it better than the hollowed. Sociopathy, sadism, delusions of grandeur, and mania are more common than the disordered thinking and chaotic behavior found in the hollowed, although repeated exposure to their Master has been known to break them further. Look again for someone paying a little too much attention to you. They may try to lure you somewhere away from the public eye with offers of food, clothing, or a hot shower. When they smile it almost never reaches their eyes and often seems predatory. Unfortunately for identification purposes this type wears their masks only when stalking and killing. Sometimes not even then. Many of them do however like to keep their mask close to them. Their weapons are various, some are even more fond of their knives than I am others prefer guns (unlike Runners and Fighter Proxies often have the resources for a lawyer and in some areas may have the police behind them!). Some of them are prone to elaborate traps like they think they're super-villains or the villain of those Saw movies. They can sometimes be found supervising someone who has been hollowed. It's also not uncommon for this type to eventually become hollowed themselves if it will serve Slendermans goals better or they prove too disobedient.

Above these there exists a higher class, what I think some refer to as Agents. The leaders of the cults, crime bosses, business men, lawyers, politicians, or law enforcement officials with a sadistic streak. Some were raised in a cult and were given positions of power and authority by other cult members who infiltrated the system before them. Others were recruited because of their positions and were offered the opportunity to indulge any sick vices they had with impunity. These are the hardest to identify. They're secretive and their sadism, sociopathic tendencies, and mania are better hidden. Their masks are only worn during ceremonies and are usually hidden away somewhere in their home. The good news is they're rarely directly involved with Runners and Fighters (except when one of us discovers them and takes the fight to them). They tend to sit back and give orders to those below them. Those more involved with the cults devoted to their Master may call meetings and lead ceremonies praising Him. Sometimes they may bail out a Proxy who's been apprehended by police for something minor, set up a frame job blaming a Runner or an innocent local for the actions of a Proxy, or hire/serve as another Proxies lawyer. Of course if what the Proxy has been accused of is too horrific and/or it's obvious they're the ones at fault the Proxy will usually be left to rot in prison. However if they're useful enough a breakout might be organized. Agents are unlikely to just come out and kill someone, if they feel an urge to kill they'll often have someone beneath them in the hierarchy kidnap someone for them to torture to death or sacrifice.

Somewhat outside this classification there does exist one more thing to worry about on this front. Quislings. Runners or Fighters, such as Elaine, who will sell out their own kind for the illusion of protection - or worse for a quick buck. That's right Elaine. You made my list. Pray we never meet.

The good thing is that for the most part a Slenderproxie dies as easily as any other man on the street and has no special attacks. At most the average Proxy might have access to the Path of Black Leaves, a sort of extra dimensional shortcut they can use to get from one place to another at great speed. I've only heard of one person who wasn't a Proxy who could access this realm and traverse it safely and he's currently thought by many to be dead. Personally I'm not convinced since they never found his body.

The problem is, while it's uncommon there have been cases where a Proxy appears to have been somehow . . . warped by contact with Slenderman (or perhaps by constant travel along the Path). It is nearly impossible to tell if you're facing one of these until it's too late. Some are known to manifest tentacles, others have super human endurance or appear to heal at an accelerated rate. Sometimes your only clue that somethings wrong is that the Proxy you just stabbed is bleeding in a color other than red. If there is even the slightest hint that the Proxy you just killed had abilities beyond the normal extraordinary means may need to be taken to ensure they don't get back up and come looking for revenge. In these cases I recommend either burning the corpse or dismembering it and scattering the limbs, especially the head.

Remember, none of these signs is a sure-fire way of spotting a Slenderproxy. These are tips to help you avoid them not a detailed guide on finding and killing them. I stalk my prey for weeks at a time confirming my suspicions before I strike (unless I catch one red handed or they're a known Proxy. If for example I encountered Ridley I already know what he is and wouldn't wait before planting my knife in him.). Don't go killing anyone just because they fit the description here. Avoid the hell out of them by all means, but don't attack them unless they attack you first. Remember kids, I'm a professional don't try killing Proxies at home.


Next time I get a chance: a quick discussion of M's three rules and a few of my own.

*I'll discuss these servants - or possibly extensions - of the Epping Aqua Tarkus in more detail in a later post.